What to Expect in Your First California Mediation Consultation

Taking the step to schedule your first mediation consultation can feel both hopeful and uncertain. You’re choosing a collaborative path forward, but you may wonder what actually happens during that initial meeting. Will it be formal or conversational? Should you bring documents? Can you ask questions freely? Understanding what to expect in your first California mediation consultation helps you prepare mentally and practically, ensuring you get the most value from this important conversation.

Whether you’re exploring mediation as an option or you’ve already decided it’s the right approach for your divorce, knowing how the consultation process works can ease anxiety and help you arrive ready to engage meaningfully with your mediator.

Your first mediation consultation serves multiple important functions. It’s an opportunity for you and your spouse to meet the mediator, learn about the mediation process, ask questions about how it works, and determine whether this approach feels right for your situation. This meeting is also the mediator’s chance to understand the basics of your case, assess whether mediation is appropriate, and explain what working together would look like.

Most California divorce mediators offer initial consultations that last between 60 and 90 minutes. Some mediators meet with both spouses together for this first session, while others prefer individual consultations with each spouse separately before bringing everyone together. Both approaches have merit, joint consultations let you see how the mediator facilitates communication between you, while individual sessions allow each spouse to speak candidly about concerns without the other present.

During this consultation, there’s no expectation that you’ll make final decisions or reach agreements about your divorce. Instead, the focus remains on education, assessment, and establishing whether mediation is the right fit. You’re essentially interviewing the mediator while they’re gathering initial information about your circumstances.

What You Should Bring and Prepare

While you don’t need extensive documentation for an initial consultation, coming prepared helps make the session more productive. Consider bringing a brief list of your assets and debts, you don’t need exact figures or formal valuations yet, but having a general sense of what you own jointly (home, vehicles, retirement accounts, savings) and what you owe (mortgages, car loans, credit cards) gives your mediator context about your situation’s complexity.

If you have children, knowing their ages, current custody arrangements, and any special needs or circumstances affecting their care is helpful. You might also think about questions or concerns you want to address during the consultation. What worries you most about the divorce process? What are your priorities? What would a successful outcome look like for you?

Many people find it useful to reflect on their communication dynamics with their spouse before the consultation. How do you typically resolve disagreements? Are there particular topics that trigger conflict? Understanding these patterns helps your mediator design a process that works for your specific relationship dynamics.

You don’t need to have all the answers or complete financial records at this stage. The consultation is about starting the conversation and determining next steps, not completing your divorce settlement.

Topics Typically Covered During the Consultation

Your mediator will likely explain the mediation process from start to finish, including how many sessions you might need, what each session typically covers, and the timeline for completing your divorce. They’ll discuss their role as a neutral facilitator who helps both of you reach agreements but doesn’t represent either spouse individually or make decisions for you.

Expect conversation about the key issues you’ll need to resolve: property division, spousal support if applicable, child custody and visitation, and child support. Your mediator will explain California’s legal framework for these issues, how courts typically approach property division, how child support is calculated, what factors affect custody decisions. This educational component helps you understand the legal landscape within which you’ll be crafting your agreements.

The consultation should address practical matters like cost and payment structure, scheduling flexibility, whether sessions can be conducted virtually or must be in person, and what happens if you reach an impasse on certain issues. Mediators typically explain their fee structure, whether they charge hourly or flat rates, and what services are included in those fees.

This is also your opportunity to ask about the mediator’s background, approach, and experience with cases similar to yours. According to California Courts’ mediation resources, understanding your mediator’s qualifications and philosophy helps ensure you’re working with someone whose style matches your needs.

Red Flags and Green Flags to Notice

Pay attention to how the mediator communicates during your consultation. Do they explain concepts clearly without using excessive legal jargon? Do they seem to listen carefully to both spouses, or does their attention favor one person? Do they create space for questions and respond thoughtfully? A skilled mediator should make you feel heard and respected while maintaining obvious neutrality.

Green flags include a mediator who explains both the benefits and limitations of mediation honestly, acknowledges when certain situations might require additional professional input like financial advisors or tax professionals, and demonstrates genuine interest in understanding your unique circumstances rather than applying a one-size-fits-all approach.

Red flags might include a mediator who seems rushed, promises unrealistic outcomes or timelines, appears to take sides even subtly, or dismisses your concerns. Trust your instincts, if something feels off during the consultation, it’s worth considering whether this is the right fit for your family.

Questions You Should Ask

Come prepared with questions that matter to your situation. Ask about the mediator’s background and how long they’ve been practicing mediation. Inquire about their approach to cases involving your specific issues, whether that’s complex property division, business ownership, high-conflict custody situations, or other concerns.

You might ask how they handle situations where spouses have different levels of financial knowledge or negotiating confidence. What happens if one spouse isn’t being fully transparent about assets? How do they ensure both parties understand the implications of agreements they’re making?

Practical questions about logistics are equally important. How do you schedule sessions? Can appointments be arranged around work schedules? What’s the cancellation policy? How do they handle communication between sessions if questions arise?

How Peacemaker Divorce Mediation Group Conducts Consultations

At Peacemaker Divorce Mediation Group – California Resolution Experts, we approach initial consultations as collaborative conversations designed to help you feel informed and comfortable with the mediation process. Scott Levin brings his background as a former litigator, in-house corporate counsel, business owner, and dispute resolution professional to create a respectful, solution-oriented environment from your very first meeting.

We take time during consultations to understand your specific situation, your concerns, and your goals. We explain mediation’s collaborative approach and how it differs from traditional litigation, ensuring you have realistic expectations about the process. We also discuss our co-mediation option, which can provide a more comfortable environment for couples who are hesitant to start mediation or who benefit from having two mediators facilitate their discussions.

Our consultation process is designed to be informative rather than pressuring. We want you to feel confident in your decision about whether mediation is right for you, and whether working with us specifically feels like a good fit. We encourage questions, provide honest assessments of your situation’s complexity, and outline clear next steps if you decide to move forward.

After the Consultation: Next Steps

Following your initial consultation, you’ll typically have time to reflect on whether mediation feels right and whether this particular mediator is someone you trust to guide the process. There’s no obligation to commit immediately, this decision deserves thoughtful consideration from both spouses.

If you decide to proceed with mediation, next steps usually involve signing an agreement to mediate that outlines the process, confidentiality provisions, and fee arrangements. Your mediator will then schedule your first full mediation session and provide guidance about what documents to gather before that meeting.

Some couples benefit from having a second consultation if they have lingering questions or want to discuss the process further before committing. This is perfectly acceptable and demonstrates the kind of thoughtful, deliberate approach that tends to serve divorcing couples well throughout the mediation process.

If you’re considering divorce mediation in California and want to learn more about what working together would look like, we invite you to schedule a confidential consultation. Contact Peacemaker Divorce Mediation Group – California Resolution Experts today to take the first step toward resolving your family matters with clarity, compassion, and confidence.